I’m a little behind here, aren’t I?
Let’s hit the highlights:
1. At week 14 we had a routine visit with my OB just to check how things were going and for her to answer any questions. Easy-peasy. It turned out to be neither “easy” or “peasy”, when the nurse (and then my doctor) detected a very noticeable “skip” in our little one’s heart beat. They ushered us into the ultrasound room where the tech confirmed an arrhythmia as well as some fluid in the kidneys and a “shadow” on the baby’s head. Oblivious, we headed back to see our doctor. She told us that the fluid in the kidneys can be a marker for Downs and the “shadow” on the baby’s head could be one of two chromosomal issues that could mean the baby would not live outside of my belly. Cue the complete breakdown. I went in to the appointment expecting everything to be ok and I was leaving the office wondering if I would still be pregnant in a month. Or if our little one would have some type of major deficiency that we would be unprepared to deal with. Or, or, or… Steven and I were both reeling. They did some blood work that would tell us if any of the concerns were real, but then were told that it would take 7-14 days to get the results back. Perfect. In the meantime, we were to come in for weekly ultrasounds to monitor the heart beat.
3. At our next ultrasound the “skip” only happened once or twice, which was an improvement. At the visit after that, it did not happen at all. Still, we waited on the blood work to confirm that everything was really going to be ok.
4. While we waited, we took a trip to Tennessee. I hit 16 weeks.
5. We had another appointment when we got back from the mountains and again, our little one passed with flying colors. Not one skip the whole time. She was even “practicing breathing”- her tiny diaphragm was contracting like a pro! The tech told us that it was a good sign of high brain function. That’s my girl! And yes, you read that right- Baby Wolfe is a girl! Thus disproving the old wives tale that craving savory foods = boy parts.
6. Test results came back. All is GOOD. No weird chromosomal issues to worry about! Healthy little baby! Insert HUGE sigh of relief here.
7. In the midst of ALL of this, we moved out of our house in order to have carpet removed and our hard wood floors refinished. And THEN we decided to paint the whole house while we were at it. Over-achievers, for sure.
8. Back at home now, our furniture is all in place, but we still have boxes everywhere. We’re slowly getting things back in order and rearranging to make room for Baby Wolfe. PS: I’ve got BIG plans for the nursery that I need to share.
9. Have I ever mentioned that 17 is my favorite number? (Let’s not get into the explanation- it won’t make sense. Just understand that # 17 rocks…) Well, it came through for me again. At 17 weeks my body decided to FINALLY give in to this little baby and accept the fact that all of these hormone related changes are NORMAL and that feeling barfy all the time just isn’t realistic anymore. Praise jeebus. I’ve felt awesome the last 2 weeks- I even went to 9round twice this week. Take THAT morning sickness! I really won’t miss you.
10. Today is Friday and I’ve just managed to take my 18 week photo even though I’ll be 19 weeks tomorrow. Better late than never, right? In other news: I’ve started to feel her moving around the last two weeks as well, which has made this whole pregnancy adventure seem very, very real. (Hello in there!)
Have a good weekend!
Ok, so you really can’t call it a bump…yet. A more accurate title would have to be: “All of the weight that this little human has forcibly caused me to gain thanks to nausea and Sonic hamburgers”-Update. But that just didn’t sound as good…
- I have now had 5 days in a row where I have felt pretty much like myself- very little nausea and a little more energy than I have had since finding out about our little one. I’m not sure if this is thanks to being officially in the “safe zone”/end of the first trimester or if all the Jedi mind tricks I’ve been using to battle the morning sickness are finally paying off. Either way, I’m not questioning it…
- I’m hoping to start working out again now that I’m feeling a little better. I don’t want to gain any more weight than I need to!!
- I bought a crib this morning. I know what you’re thinking, it IS early and no, we still don’t know if baby is a he or a she, but the crib I’ve been eyeing was part of a Zulily deal this morning so with their discount and a coupon code, I was able to get the crib for $150 less than what it is normally. *High fives all around!*
- Because Saturday was the official end of my first trimester, I finally caved and decided to go on a fact finding mission to a couple of baby stores here in Charleston with my mama. (I refused to go look at any baby items prior to hitting this milestone- I was so afraid I would jinx something.) After sitting in about 15 different types/shapes/varieties of gliders I felt like I had learned a lot about what some of the items on our list would cost and the quality of a few items I was interested in. Plus, we got pumpkins.
- I’m planning on trying to take a photo every 2 weeks or so throughout this process (even
ifwhen I get huge and fat and presumably hate any and all photos taken of me). Since we’re thinking that this little one may be our ONLY one, I want to document the process as best as I can. (And save me your comments about the joys of siblings or spoiled only children…I’m not listening! Why would anyone sign up to do this more than once?!)
- I haven’t noticed any major cravings this week, although I will say that my once BFF hot dogs are now on the “no thank you” list. Also, I made an entire pork loin in the crock pot the other night and couldn’t eat a bite of it. Pork isn’t my favorite when I’m not pregnant and it is evidently a definite NO right now. I ended up having to toss the whole thing. Still not wanting chocolate or ice cream, which I never thought I would say.
- My sister gave me a big box of her maternity clothes a few weeks ago and I am now referring to it as the “magic maternity box”- without it there would be way more crying every morning…. (Thanks, Rachel!!)
I have to say that I’ve had really, really great self control when it comes to not buying baby items so far.
Ok. In all actuality, I have to admit that self control really doesn’t have much to do with anything and more to do with the fact that I feel like a poopsicle. On a hot summer day.
Also, not knowing whether baby Wolfe will be a he or she has kind of put a damper on shopping. HOWEVER, I love looking around on Etsy and have seen a few things lately that I really feel like my little bundle of joy needs. Yes, needs. Bold & italics. Take that.
1. I’m dying over these cute fox leggings. I love the bear ones too.
2. This onesie is actually in my shopping cart as we speak. I’m contemplating buying the print for the nursery as well. Love.
3. This crib bumper is a little pricey, but I think it’s adorable.
4. Yes, another fox.
5. I know it will be a long time before our little one will play with these, but I love the colors.
Are you picking up what I’m putting down? I love the rustic, eclectic feeling that all of these silly items have. I’m hoping to do the nursery kind of like this:
Obviously, I’m thinking baby Wolfe may be a boy….What do you think?
It’s been awhile since I’ve posted a round up of desktops, but since I’m ready for a new one I thought I’d share a few of the cute ones that I came across today.
2. The Fox is Black:
4. And because fall would not be complete without a little bit of Charlie Brown, Kelly Ashworth Design:
Alternate titles for this post include:
- That Time I Wanted to Puke for 3 Months Straight
- Touch Me and Die
- I’m Not Fat, I’m Pregnant
- I Only Want Hot Dogs & Other Concerns
- A List of Grievances: A Letter To Eve
I just looked back and the last time I posted anything out here on the old interwebs was the day before everything changed.
Let’s go back, ok?
Here’s what was happening at the beginning of August:
1. I was painfully aware that August marked the 15th month of trying to have a baby. About a week before, I had been to the doctor only to hear her say, “I think we need to start talking about fertility treatments.” Over the course of the past year and a half I had cried, prayed, yelled, begged…but nothing was happening. Steven and I felt strongly that if we were meant to have a baby, then God would allow us to get pregnant on our own. We finished up the last couple of non-invasive tests and when the results came back normal, we decided that enough was enough. No more. No more talking about it. No more crying about it. No more.
2. I decided to enroll in grad school. I knew I had to get my mind busy on something else rather than allowing myself to fixate on the baby we weren’t having. I was all set to begin school on August 19th. I wrote more about that here.
3. I began to delete all baby related items from my world. No more baby blogs. Avoid Pinterest. Work out more. Steven and I stopped discussing what would happen “when we have a baby” and began talking more about other interests. What else could we be doing?
4. Those other interests led to me accidentally finding an old house for sell out in the country that needed a lot of work. It was on a beautiful piece of land with a shared dock and the house itself was actually an old school house built in the 1800s. We were in love. It needed a ton of work, but hey, we needed a distraction. We set up a showing with the realtor. We toured the house once on our own. And then again when we dragged Steven’s parents out to take a look. They could see what this house COULD be too. We even went so far as to ask the realtor to come take a look at our current home and began the process of putting it on the market.
And then everything changed.
That week we were expecting results from the final test we’d taken regarding getting pregnant- I knew when the doctor called that she would ask if I had taken a test recently, so on the afternoon that I expected the phone call I went to Target at lunch and bought a test. I thought, “This is the last time. It will be negative and after this I can stop thinking about it.” I even took the test at work, that’s how sure I was that it would be negative.
The bathroom at work is dark, but as the test processed I could see a tiny, barely there line appearing in the “You’re Pregnant” box. Umm, what? I put the test back in the wrapper and tried to go back to work. Instead, I was up checking the test every 10 minutes to make sure that A: the line was still there and B: that I hadn’t dreamed it. Nope. Still sort of there. Holy crap. I couldn’t wait for the doctor to call. Do you get false positives? What does it mean if the line is only sort of there? She finally called when I was on the way to the gym. I told her about the test and I could hear her voice change from informative to excited. After all, this poor woman had been the one to hear me cry on the phone every time she called with a negative result (which was a lot in the past 14 months). It felt so nice for her to give me good news for a change- I think for both of us! She told me to take another test in the morning and then call her back.
I went to the gym. I was waffling back and forth between excitement and cautiousness. I kept telling myself not to get too excited. It’s probably a fluke. There’s no way. In the end I decided not to tell Steven until I’d taken the test the next morning. We’d been through so much, I just didn’t want to disappoint him again if it turned out to be nothing. When I got home, he was in a silly mood and was talking about babies. He had no idea what was going on and yet there he was breaking our new rule about “no baby talk”. All night he kept bringing up things his friends had said about their kids. What a customer had said about being pregnant that day. Had I seen so-and-sos new baby on Facebook? As we got ready for bed, I even said, “What in the world has gotten into you? We’re not talking about this anymore!” He just told me that it was on his mind that day, but that he knew it upset me so he would knock it off.
The next morning, the test was undeniably positive. Steven was off that day, so I went to work with plans to come home at lunch to tell him. It was SO hard to keep the secret. This is what we’d been praying for- I couldn’t believe that it was actually happening. On the way home from lunch I stopped and bought a onesie from a sports store. When I got home I told him that I’d gotten him a present and tossed him the rolled up onesie. He was so confused. He sat there with his mouth open for a full minute or two. I could tell he was going over all of the recent tests, wondering how it was even possible. Finally he just started smiling.
I think we’ve been smiling ever since.
It’s August. Can you believe it? I’m already starting to look forward to pumpkins, scarves, and cooler weather. It’s been such a weird, rainy summer that I honestly have only been in my bathing suit about three times total….which means that I’m greeting this fall with unusually pastey legs. Bummer.
August also means the start of my new adventure: graduate school. I’m SO looking forward to having something to concentrate on! All of this change means that it’s probably time to update the ol’ desktop image while I’m at it. Here are a few of my favorites from around the interwebs.
1. This one is super simple, but I kind of like to keep my desktop relatively minimalistic. Also, anything with arrows these days = true love for me…
via Let’s Illustrate
2. “I haven’t been everywhere, but it’s on my list.” How appropriate.
via Design Is Yay
3. Just for fun.
via A Fine Line
4 & 5. I just stumbled on Breanna Rose’s website and there are several cute backgrounds to choose from. Go look.
There ya have it. A few pretty awesome options to start your month off right.
Have a good week!
Seems like a million years ago that I was saving and obsessing over ways to update my kitchen.
I’ve been promising pictures, but I had a few final touch ups before I was ready to send my kitchen out into the interwebs. I wish I had better quality photos, but I don’t… So you’ll just have to bear with me. Deal?
We used to have an over the range microwave, but after a horrible weekend that resulted in buying 3 and returning 2 new microwaves, we ended up with a fancy new range hood. (Thanks, Dad!) Even though it was a HUGE pain, I’m really glad that we ended up going this route. I feel like I have so much more room when I’m cooking now!
Thankfully I was able to use that weird little nook for the new counter top microwave without having to sacrifice much actual counter space. *Whew.*
Here are those extra cabinets that we added for more storage. I don’t know how I lived without them….
This is the view as you’re walking into the kitchen from the foyer. I seriously die over my back splash every time I see it. Obsessed.
Dishes don’t seem so bad with my smexy (channeling Mama June over here) new faucet.
Here’s a shot of my updated dining room. I’m still loving the paint color and the pops of green just work so well in here, which kind of surprises me. I don’t think I would have put the colors together originally, but somehow they seem to compliment each other well. I’m also loving the gallery wall, but I’ve got to figure out a way to keep all the frames straight. Crooked frames make me itch.
Last but not least, let’s just take a moment to appreciate these black and white canisters. I
stalked eyed them at Target until they went on sale and then once they did I may or may not have knocked small children out of the way to get all three.
No regrets here. #yolo
In all seriousness, I love that the pattern on the canisters mimics the pattern on the rug. It was a happy accident, but I’m going to claim that I planned it that way….No one needs to know, right?
So there you go. It was years in the making, but I feel like all of the planning and saving gave me time to figure out exactly what I wanted and how to make it all work. I really love the way the space feels warm and eclectic.
I have some news.
I’m going to grad school.
Yup, I’m biting the bullet and going back to school. If you’ve spent any time around me the last few months, you know that I’ve felt a little discontent and under stimulated in my current career path. You may have also known that while I knew that I wanted to do something different, I was at a complete loss as to WHAT that something different would be.
So I did what anyone with constant access to the interwebs would do- I googled myself into complete frustration. I searched job postings and Craigslist. I considered every single profession that came up on TV or in movies. I asked family and friends what their opinions were. I sent constant prayers up hoping that God would just shoot me an email and tell me what to do. I even went on the Bureau of Labor & Statistics website and researched the top careers/salaries in 2012. After I admitted to myself that I do not have any desire to be an anesthesiologist or to work in any other field where there is a possibility of getting puked on, one profession FINALLY peaked my interest. Professional counseling.
As someone who has benefited from therapy in the past, I thought, “I could do that.” That thought continued to filter through my mind as all of the research I was doing made it clear that there are not very many resources out there for young 20-30 somethings in my shoes. (AKA: I have a college degree, but have no idea what I want to be when I grow up- now what?) There should be people out there to help. And to help for reasonable fees, not for thousands of dollars.
In end, I decided that I want to help people figure out what makes them happy. I want to do something with my life that MATTERS.
The more I thought about the idea, the more perfect it seemed. I ended up chatting with an admissions counselor at Liberty University (a Christian college in Virginia) who answered all of the my questions and even waived my application fee. I thought, “What do I have to lose? No harm in applying.” So I did. And then I held my breath and prayed that if this wasn’t the right direction that the Lord would close the doors. But so far, I’ve only gotten green lights.
There are still a few pieces that need to be settled (financial aid), but I’m hopeful that this is the right decision for me. I feel relieved and happy to have a DIRECTION. To be working towards something.
It’s about time.
There’s a lot of change going on around me and in me lately. Some changes that I want and are happy about and some changes that I’m anticipating that just aren’t happening fast enough.
But this weekend, the teaching pastor at my church said something that really hit home for me:
“Don’t aspire to be in a place you’re not prepared for yet.”
He also talked about how sometimes what we see as a trial, often ends up being preparation. Preparation for what’s coming next. Lessons that I’ll need for the new season in my life. And while I am absolutely and without question having a hard time standing back and accepting that I’m NOT in control (seriously, I am fighting the unknown tooth & nail), in the end I really do believe that all of this waiting and changing is going to work out for good.
So on this Monday that is full of new challenges and changes, I’m
trying fighting choosing to be still.